Are you looking for a surefire way to better sex? There are so many factors that can affect your libido, so finding an answer may take some patience. But help is available if you seek it.
Sexuality is a complex combination of physical and psychological responses to stimuli, so you may need to enlist the help of more than one kind of health professional to help solve intimacy problems. Your doctor can determine if there are any underlying medical causes of sexual dysfunction. He or she can also direct you to other healthcare professionals who may be able to help, such as counselors or therapists.
1. Live healthfully: Eat a balanced diet, get plenty of rest, and exercise regularly. A healthy body can lead to a better sex life, so taking good care of your body is the first step. In fact, regular exercise may be one of the most important keys to healthy sexual function. Research suggests that people who exercise regularly have increased blood flow throughout their bodies, including the genital area, which may help improve sex drive.
2. Turn off the tube. And turn on your partner! Take an active role in your evening entertainment by skipping a night of television to make time for physical intimacy. TV viewing could be getting in the way of your love life in more ways than one: Research suggests that it is associated with an increased prevalence of erectile dysfunction (ED).
3. Skip the music and candlelight. If it's romance you're after, try watching a heart-pumping action flick, laughing your head off at a comedy club, or even doing some aerobic exercise. Research has shown that anything that arouses rather than suppresses the nervous system -- that is, anything that hikes your heart rate and works your cardiovascular system -- can significantly enhance sexual response.
4. Pick the perfect time. It's not just a matter of making time for lovemaking; it’s also about choosing the best time. Research pinpoints the days when you are more likely to have better sex and better orgasms. One study found that some women have better, more frequent orgasms during days 6 to 10 of the menstrual cycle (day 1 is the first day of a woman's period), which may mean a more enriched experience for both partners. The exact time of day makes no difference; sex hormones are fairly consistent over the course of a day.
5. Focus on amorous olfactory. Need help relaxing? Try lavender-scented oils, sachets, and lotions to help you or your partner unwind and get in the mood. Studies suggest that the smell of lavender may increase feelings of relaxation and reduce mental stress in some people. However, certain scents inspire different reactions in different people, so experiment until you find the one that works for you.
6. Open up. Be sure to keep communication lines open. Sharing your thoughts and ideas will help you and your partner understand and respect each other's likes, dislikes, moods, and desires. It also will help provide an atmosphere conducive to problem solving.
7. Watch your alcohol intake. One drink may loosen you up and get you in the mood for love, but too much alcohol in your bloodstream may hinder your sexual performance and response. Alcohol depresses the central nervous system, which slows down nerve impulses, hinders your coordination, and makes it difficult to get or maintain an erection or to maintain sufficient vaginal lubrication for sexual activity.